“Is this what you want Cheska?” Jed shouts at me. After the incident in the car with Nathan, Noah, Jonah and Jed, he drags me off to his house but now I am so scared. Why are you scared? He betrayed you by kissing Rose! 

My subconscious spats.

“We didn’t do anything, we just… we need to be ready for the photo shoot” I explain. “If that so, why didn’t you tell me?” he shouts. “Why do I have to tell you? You didn’t even tell me about you being with Rose and kissing her!” I yell back. Go on Cheska, don’t back down! 

“So this is all about? Me kissing the woman I love and that she…” “You don’t have to tell me because I know it! So for all this ridiculous things to be finish, I will just participate to the photo shoot and go back to my parents” I sigh with tiredness.

“And what will you tell them? That I…” “I will lie to them, I will find a way then when the six months come I’ll let my attorney talk to you about the divorce” I said “I should go, Nathan and the others will be waiting for me” I stand up from the couch and walk towards the front door. “I’ll drive you there” he snaps. I nod yes only because I don’t know the place and I’m also tired.

“We’re going to use your motorbike?” I ask confusingly. “Yeah, do you have any problem with that?” he asks. “No, not really it’s just that nothing. Let’s go” I said. “Wear my helmet” he commands “Why would I wear that if I can wear the reserve one?” I ask again. You keep on asking too many questions, just wear them” I do as he said and ride at his motorcycle. I’m sitting at his back and off we go.

Jed drive slowly “Are you okay?” he asks “Yes, it’s just I’m afraid to ride a motorbike” I explain while panting. Later I know he stops the engine and took off his helmet and I do the same. “Why didn’t you say so?” he asks turning his head to look at me. “Because… because…” I don’t know how to explain, I’m ridiculously nervous and my hands are shaking. “Cheska, are you alright?” “Yes, I am. Let’s go just don’t worry about me” I give him a reassuring smile but I know he didn’t buy it! “Tell me” he whispers. “I’ve been in an accident with my brother and I promise that I will not ride a motorbike ever again but you came and…” Jed gently gives me a kiss and shockingly I’m kissing him back. And all of the fights back then were all flash out and I forgive him but I couldn’t forget him kissing Rose and he said it’s her he love which means he doesn’t love me. I push him and quickly.

“I’m sorry, I… I really am” I mutter. “Cheska, about Rose and I back…” “I know it! Besides you’re right, she’s the one you must marry and not me. Jed I understand and I’m okay with it” I smile but deep down inside I’m in so much pain. If only you know, but I don’t own your heart.

“Cheska I…” “Come on Jed, let’s go. The rest are waiting and so that I can go back home tonight” I didn’t let him explain, I put his helmet back on my head and he did the same using the reserve helmet. “Are you sure you want to ride the motorbike?” he asks. “Yes, I need to face my fears” then again we start on our way.

It’s a 15 minutes’ ride from where we stop to the Rider Community Beach. I can smell the salty breeze that brought from the salty water. I walk towards the other models while Jed is behind me. 

“Hey, they’re here” Nathan announces. “Hi” Noah greets. “Don’t you dare do that again” I snap. “Do what?” he asks. “You know what I mean” then I left him. I look all over around and I saw Jed and Rose talking privately again. Ouch! 

My subconscious mutter, I nod in agreement but what can I say? I’m just the invader.

“Cheska, hurry up! It’s your time to shine. Dress her now!” Nathan commands. “Dress me? I can dress…” “We will dress you, I mean here come now, double time” the designer commands. I look at Jed but he is still busy talking to the woman who owns his heart, so I follow the command of the fashion designer.

“You’re breathtaking Cheska” the designer exclaims and the other staff nods in agreement. “You will totally rock this summer magazine” Nathan smiles at me and again the staff nods in agreement. I’m wearing a black with white strips bikini but I’m covered with transparent overlay so the bikini will still be able to see, with matching shades and not wearing any slippers.

After 30 minutes’ the photo shoot is done, I need to change 10 outfits and pose different styles and now I’m exhausted. Nathan and the other staffs are start packing up their belongings. Still I haven’t seen Jed left Rose, they are still talking. Stop it Cheska! Don’t fool yourself. Use the brain now please? 

My subconscious begs. I need to stay cool, so for me not to be rude.

“Excuse me” I said. Jed and Rose both look at me intently. “Jed, I have to go” I said. “Let me drive you back to my house” he said. “Jed you promise me that you’re going to help me pack my things” Rose’s interrupts. Jed looks at me and to Rose, he’s confuse and I can tell that “Well, I can walk back there and besides I know where to go. Bye” then I walks away from them.

I arrive at Jed’s house and there I felt empty. I love him but he loves someone else and I know that already, why Jed? Why did you make me fall in love with you if you’re not going to catch me?

I pack my things and glance at the clock, it’s already 6 pm and Jed is not home yet but I need to go. I waited five more minutes and still Jed’s not back but I need to go, I have to. I just probably write him a letter! 

Then I did and left the place.